Wednesday, August 27

mornings are for treats.

when you wake up thinking about apples,
and you go downstairs,
and there are totally apples hanging out on the counter?
it's a lot like when life hands you lemons, neighbors.
i had apples on my mind,
and organic fancy ones in my kitchen,
so i did what anybody would do-
i peeled and cored and sliced and diced and simmered the sh!t outta those
little red F*ers, with maple syrup and cinnamon and salt and a pat of butterish.
mmmhmmmm.
because that's the way you make 'em soft and succulent in place of other
liquids and leaveners inside of breakfast bombs.
breakfast bombs?
yup.
you read that right.
the big muffin cups got shaken out of their retirement,
from the way back of the baking cabinet to the front rack of the oven.
that's when you know it's serious.
giant apple cinnamon muffins in the morning is where i needed to take it.
and it got taken there, and then some.
check the teleport:
a little soy yogurt, and a cup and change of demerera sugar,
vanilla, and maple, and cinnamon, and a stick of butts,
a dash of salt, a few tea-style spoons of baking pow-pow,
and a tsp. of baking soda, for good measure (that is a big muffin tin, after all)...
all of that,
plus a little tapioca, a lot of oat flour,
and even more real grown-up flour-
and the juiciest warm wet apple filling, too
that makes 'em soft, and spongy, and cakey, and dope.
mmmmmhmmm.
what?
the icing?
well,
since i wasn't using streusel, or sprankles, or nuts,
that meant i had a small problem-
i needed something super-sweet and sexy to amp 'em up another step or two.
cinnamaple honeybun-style icing was the obviously the only right answer.
thick.
that's the key.
thick and aromatic.
the whole house, and the whole tattbomb studio,
all smell like autumny activation.
that's real-life air freshening.
wherever me and my muffins go,
we're instigating big sniffs.
because that good-air-stank is what we provide.
if you think they smell ghood,
wait until you put one in your mouth, friend.
i mean it.
the apple awesomeness of the seasonally-appropriate tree-ripened early reds
sure as sh!t make it all even more expert.
giant cakes in cup shapes,
with all the best in copious quantity?
yep.
too much is the right amount.
that's it.
we do what we do over here in the Folk Life & Liberty Fortress.
super-concentrated folksy vegan woodsly goodness is all that there ever is going on,
but that's more than most can handle.
*
dreaming it,
AND being it.
we doo-doo that freaky sh!t;
never quiet, never soft.....

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