Thursday, October 30

MISCHIEF.

it's mischief night.
mmhmm.
the one before hallowe'en.
no,
i won't be toilet papering any schools.
no.
i won't be shaving creaming and door handles.
no.
i won't be soaping any windows.
hmm?
yes.
i will be wrapping up some cupcake baking,
and i afterwards i most certainly will be using a superhot glue gun.
that's what sort of mischief i get up to these days.
and also,
i dress up.
playing the part of an industrious man of science,
a professor of lightning-harnessing atmospheric storm-navigation,
and an al-around fancy man about town.
that's me.
and on mischief night/day,
i doo-doo that costume-type sh!t.
check the telport:
yeah!
i mean,
c'mon.
with the tippity-top hat,
and that big ol' burly brass-breathing deep-pressurized
upper ionospheric diving harness?
it's kind of expert.
i sure hope so.
with those tailored tweeds,
and all the rest of it, too.
mmhmmmm.
mischief is on the menu,
and so is pumpkin flavored everything.
rules is rules, neighbors, and that's just how it's gonna be.
more?
oh, okay, have a little more:
because without a stratospherium electronophizer,
how would power the dang thing?
y'know?
which is why it has one, obvi.
and from the back:
yep.
sassy, sophisticated, steamy steampunk preholiday active participation.
i just love costumes, kids.
so much.
get a closer look at this sh!t:
and check the teleport for those spatterdasher gaiter jauns, too:
all the tanks and hoses and valves and gauges.
i just want y'all to know how much work,
against time and the weather, that this little jobber took.
...because it was a flippin' ordeal.
all kinds of painting, and priming and plasti-dipping,
plus lights and pleather and tacks and rivets and everything.
and this is just one of three,
over the next few days.
of course, there's so much more to say,
and even more still left to do.
in fact,
i'm cutting this one short,
because it's all still going on, especially right now;
never quiet, never soft.....

where've i been?

shuuuuuuuut up.
where've YOU been?
because where i've been is gettin' busy,
heading into the future,
and getting ready for my favorite time.
that's where the heck I'VE been.
and i've been in my kitchen, baking,
and i've been on my kitchen floor, making,
and i've been at the tattbomb studio faking my enthusiasm,
and also,
genuinely working on projects when there's no work.
i should've brought some today,
instead,
it was all walk-ins, all damned day long....
and seriously,
that was the lamest part.
well,
that and the weather.
y'know?
it was lightly breezin',
and sunny,
and warmish,
and nothing at all like yesterday when i was trying to paint
and glue and shape and mold and tape and paint some more...
the high humidity and the dirty biting cold downpours weren't helping at all.
so,
the perfect weather, today,
was a solid five-fingered palmslap in the face of being finished with costumes an' that.
hmmmmmm?
no,
i'm not finished, all the way,
but i was all the way finished with today's costume.
today?
yeah.
today.
three days of hallowe'en, neighbors.
that's a thing.
or,
it is if you actually love hallowe'en and aren't just talking up some bullsh!t
to inflate your actual real-life enthusiasm.
y'heard?
woooooooooooord.
so,
i may also have been pretty busy in the oven area of my workspace, too,
in between trips to the stores, anyway.
mmmhmmmm.,
because what's up with treats?
right?
loctobery hottness needed to happen in my mouth,
and i think we all know what was the most necessary action to activate.
yes.
that's correct.
vegan pumpkin chee'cake.....
check the teleport:
aren't you glad you scrolled down past all those dumb words?
yeah.
i thought you would be.
extra buttery cinnamon graham crackery crustiness,
and super-firm soft deep, rich, sexy pumpkin magic filling.
what?
oh, that.
well,
it just so happens that it's cinnamon vanilla butterscotch drizzle,
and it's the F*ing big business.
no joke.
and with a goobieblop of soya-whippedy creme on top?
mmmmmmmmmmm.
breakfast at the Folk Life & Liberty Fortress went to eleven.
yep.
***********
chee'cake first thing in the morning?
expert.
that was, like, just right.
but,
no sleep the night before?
that's not even close to good.
and then, when you factor in the whole week before that,
staying up late,
and forgetting to eat,
and burning myself,
and huffing fumes,
and stressing out to the limits of sanity over minutiae ,
all of it, all the time,
just so i could go to the studio, and tattoo random, unimpressed strangers?
mmmhmmm.
real life always prevails.
all that work, largely unnoticed.
that's what being a woodsly goodsly warrior poet is all about, i s'pose.
live away from like-minded people,
try harder, be louder, and participate more than they do,
and then watch as the results pale in comparison to the effort.
....and eventually disappear.
it's all really happening.
that's the whole point;
never quiet, never soft.....

Monday, October 27

going bananas.

banana bread takes FOREVER to bake, duders.
like,
foreva eva,
and that's especially lame when you're hungry for a big slab or three.
y'know?
yeah.
i tried something different this time, too.
in addition to cocoa for chocofication,
i eschewed tapioca on it's own for binding moistenization,
and instead added vegan instant chocolate pudding.
holy F*ing sh!t, neighbrs!!
the densest, heaviest-duty booty-blastin' brown bomber resulted.
i'm sayin',
it's thick, it's rich, it's soft, it's firm, it's sweet, it's neat,
and it's alllllllll mine.
check the bananarama-type teleport:

mmmmmmmm.
lookin' at the mountains out my morning window seat,
drinking a piping hot cuppa,
and going down hard on this burly barbaric beast of a bread?
yes.
today is the day.
i'm feeling pretty good about this breakfast treat, too.
i added a ton of chocolate chips,
so,
while there ARE bananas in it,
it's still basically a loaf of cake,
and it's also totally flippin' expert.
too many slices inside my bellyhole,
not enough sleep behind my see-balls,
and so much to do all the time.
the good news?
while that bread is baking,
you can basically run a marathon,
or paint a respirator,
or lay out acres of crafty bits and tiny doodads,
and ruin all available surfaces everywhere but the kitchen countertop.
(that's for mixing and mashing and stirring)
***********
lots and lots.
that's the minimum amount of everything.
that's the plan for today's to-do list.
to do:
LOTS and LOTS of every. single. thing.
ugh.
this mad scramble across the brisk hours of this morning is brought to you
by bananas, and chocolate, and mountains.
this is it.
this is what i've become.
baking and making and hermitage,
like a hairy fairy from the forest.
that's my time,
and that's my place,
and that's the truth.
every day there's more of all of it,
and every day, there's more to do;
never quiet, never soft.....

paints and pipes.

ummmm,
i have been staying up later and later,
and getting up earlier and earlier.
i guess i'm just excited about hallowe'en.
i don't know why, really.
i mean,
i still haven't made any plans,
and i still haven't finished anything up.
but,
even if i'm staying home eating candy all by my lonely,
after working all day on cover-ups and craptards,
i'm still psyched on hallowe'en.
and also on making stuff.
i painted some stuff.
like that foam facepiece i showed y'all a little minute ago....
primer black, flat brown, metallic bronze, antique brass.
all of 'em,
in various concentrations, and to great effect.
and when i was done with the rattlecan flash and splash,
you know i had to go in there with the metallic wax finishes,
and then add all the pleathery trimmings,
and the real-life metal bits and bobs,
and then spread on the dark washes and wipes,
and the highlight drybrushing,
and then a bunch more pleather and pleats and pins and needles....
neighbors,
check the gasmask-monster-magic-type teleport:
allow me to present the stratospherium rebreather apparatus!
and from the side:
and in the rear, the hoses connect to the aetheric regulation tanks:
because what else would they do, right?
mmmhmmmm.
damn.
what a screaming giant dork i am.
i don't know what cracked the seal on this explosion of makey nerd action,
but it's out of control.
i can't wait to read a book or ten, and rake leaves, and cook fancy dinners,
and vacuum this whole flippin' place once november second rolls around.
y'know?
yeah.
in the meantime,
the next few days are gonna be a mad dash scramble to finish up what i can,
and dress up like a big fun big time three-costume crash-test active participant.
oh, yeah.
and there's just one other 'nother thing, kids.....
it lights up, too:
wu-TANG!
what?
no, it's not pointed at my eyes.
jeez.
what kind of an A*-hole do you think i am?
take it easy.
that's reflected light, and it's expert.
i s'pose i should be psyched, huh?
i mean,
i'm doing what i like,
and i'm making things that don't suck too hard.
i'm just still wondering why.
i'm sure there's a secret reason in there somewhere,
and the secret universal plan is providing me with the opportunity
to undertake a project designed to hone my disused makery skills
and to meet deadlines an' that whilst adding on more ad more and more.
the object, after all is said and done, is more.
too much is the right amount,
and it's all building towards something bigger and better, always.
because,
it's all always really happening, and i'm doo-dooing everything i can to keep it going.
yep.
i'm choosing this crafty craftmaker costume catastrophe wrench
because i feel like i HAVE to.
harder styles and harder times are all i ever expect,
so i'm really just building up my immunity, glued seam by glued seam.
today,
i drill 1" holes over and over into pvc pipes.
tonight,
i screw shirt sleeves into plastic tubes.
tomorrow,
i affix conductive electro-thermonetics (lamp-top-finials) to it all.
this is what's up,
and this is what i'm about;
never quiet, never soft.....

Friday, October 24

unpainted.

gross.
that's what craft foam looks like before the primer and the paint.
i get so disappointed in the meantimes,
especially when it's cold and wet and rainy,
and there's no time or available atmosphere to correct the raw state
of a new makey thing.
i'm just sayin'-
clear plastic and green fluff is not an expert look.
trust me.
no?
oh, okay.
then maybe you'll trust your own eyes:
right??
before you just assume i'm totally F*ing up though,
the details are what bring it all together.
for a basic framework,
the shape is there.
the bulk is burly and barbaric.
it's just that the extras and add-ons are gonna activate the sh!t out of it
once it has the right combination of bells and whistles..
but, right now?
yeah.
it looks kinda lame-ish.
i know it does.
then again,
i also know what i'm making, so i can envision the end result.
and it's a good thing i can, too.
otherwise, i'll tell you what-
i'd maybe think i was bringing the weak sauce up in here.
and that's not cool.
not one little tiny bit.
so,
more projects.
more more more more more of everything.
except time.
that's running way short.
i'm glad i've got what i've got,
and i'm sure i'll get as much done as i possibly can.
it's not like i'm trick-or-treatin',
or costume partyin',
or even doing anything besides workin'.
the thing of it is,
i'm reppin' the spirit and memory of dressed-up mess-ups
for all the grown-A* woodsly goodfellows everywhere.
i like it.
you do too.
yeah.
***********
i've been busy everywhere but at work.
driving and shopping and baking and making messes and cleaning up.
uh-huh.
but work has been a total butthole.
hit-or-miss fluctuations,
and terrible ideas all up in my face on the occasions there are even any ideas at all.
sure,
i've got a full day today,
but yesterday was full of crap.
and NO tattoos.
plenty of craft-makin' and hot gluin',
and lots of second-thoughts and deconstruction.
but, no movie checks,
and that's no joke.
it's dark, and dreary, and dreadful,
and i'm unimpressed to say the least.
check the discount-countenance-type teleport:
drivin' around, thinkin' about all the work i'm gonna do as soon as i get home,
and all the sleep i'm gonna skip while i doo-doo that tedious sh!t.
i'm on my grind, and i'm doing all of it as loud, as fresh, and as hard as i can.
the Folk Life & Liberty Fortress worthy warrior rulebook says-
stay ugly, stay dope.
...and you know i love house rules.
i'm not sure what the point is,
other than occupation of my creative faculties.
i'm not sure at all about that.
i'm not having fun.
i'm just having a time of it.
spanning time with the self-imposed pressure to always do more.
there are worse things, though, for certain.
i'm running short on time, but i'm not OUT of time.
a better fate than that is every single minute of all the rest of it.
it's all really happening,
and the why will resolve itself if i just keep going.
that's it;
never quiet, never soft.....

cake.

so much cake.
that's how much cake i want.
yup.
that's the stuff, neighbors.
cake after cake after cake.
i'm just sayin'-
cake is expert.
also,
chocolate is pretty damned good too.
actually, it's really really good.
that gets it going every time.
y'heard?
and when i start thinking about cake AND chocolate.....
well,
you know how it's gonna go.
active participation and preheated ovens, y'all.
that's the ticket to treat paradise.
check the density-deluxe-type teleport:
yeah!
vegan white chocolate fudge in a circle.
a.k.a. the big action.
what that means in real life is-
i left out the baking powder!
uh-huh.
heavy-duty pound-cake consistency results,
especially when activating tapioca to make with that anti-dryness-style
pudding-in-the-mix business.
so,
burly brick circle jauns,
in fudgy white chocolate splendor
(i know it's not actually chocolate. take it easy.)
it tastes good, too.
like,
it tastes 100% not ruined for not having the fluff, anyway.
now,
add that cocoa marshmallow-swirl cream-chee'-laced frosting,
and you've got ultimate decadence and shameless self-indulgence to eleven.
what do you even do after that?
oh, right....
dark chocolate drizzle lattice wizardry.
mmmhmmmm.
too much is the right amount.
no joke.
at least two kinds of chocolate,
and one pretend chocolate, too.
that sh!t is good for you, and it's good in you.
heck, it might even be good ON you.
no way to know for sure.
what we can say we know, though, for certain,
is that i have some at work, and you're welcome to munch up a slice.
you're welcome, kids.
**********
one week until hallowe'en.
oh yeah!
the best one.
you'd better believe i'm excited for it,
and you'd be wise to recognize that i'm dreading it.
huh?
yeah.
duders,
i've got three semi-finished incomplete costumes.
hmmm?
yeah, i know.
but, listen, friends-
i spent so much time on details that the details became their own things.
what can i say?
sometimes the spin-off runs longer than the ensemble.
think frasier to cheers.
sorry young people...
no. wait. F* that.
young people don't read blogs.
ha!
regardless,
i'm still making things.
maybe some of it will become a costume,
maybe some of it will just be how i span my time away from work.
i guess we'll find out in a week;
never quiet, never soft.....

Thursday, October 23

connecticut.

well,
that was quick.
yeah.
neighbors,
the woodsly goodness is so flippin' different than my birthplace.
i mean it.
like, different planets, almost,
with people so drastically dissimilar as to be a species altogether separate from my own.
the good news?
i don't really socialize with either subset of folks.
not the nutmeg-stately urban-derived ethnically-ambiguous dirties in connecticut,
nor the bearded camouflagians in workboots that predominate the north country.
mostly,
i have the ones i'm around,
and the rest can F* right off.
the last few days were no exception.
me, and harvest and maple,
and a little tiny bit of my parents, too.
that's all i really needed.
berfday shoppin' after school?
yeah.
dinner in the city?
yeah.
cake at home?
yeah.
c'mon.
that's all that had to happen.
well,
that and also this:
i'm sayin'- rules is rules.
don't be dumb.
emergency tofutti with fall sprankles is a must.
and if i must, i must, and i certainly will.
*
anyway,
we had a good time.
there was a lot of driving.
across the northeast, and back again, in a short span of time,
with a whole ton of travel between towns once i got there...
but that's just the way it is.
you know what i did when i got to where i had to be?
yup.
i parked out of sight at the high school.
uh-huh.
because who knows if i'm embarrassing or not?
right?
what'd be worse than getting picked up at school
by some big loserhole of a parent in front of the rest of the entire student body?
ew!
nothin'.
i know what i look like, guys.
and i'd hate to be a source of stress to my kids.
turns out, she doesn't care, because she is not an A*-hole,
and apparently, in her eyes, neither am i.
expert.
so i picked her up, and she ruined about thirteen photographs,
until i caught this one without her making a face:
candid profile jauns.
awwwwwwwwwwww.
i remember when she was just a cute little baby!
everybody says it, but that's because it's a thing.
tall boots and high socks and flowing hair is a helluva lot different
than onesies and poopie diapers, so the passage of time is really severe.
what a beauty, tho.
actually,
they both are good-lookin', hard-workin', sweethearts, and that's no joke.
harvest:
maple:
huh?
i don't know what she's showing me.
i was taking pictures, man.
the thing is, they're big. ...for small people at least.
yep.
and they're really becoming actual people.
luckily,
they're not too sh!ttty yet.
and we had a hallowe'en moment, too.
uh-huh.
because i handed out all the ingredients for their costumes,
an they went bananas,
and everybody had big fun.
-
duders,
connecticut was a blur of food and roads and family togetherness.
i can't tell you about the relief i'm feelin' at how easy it all went.
the times have changed.
the fights are over.
the war is won/lost/forgotten about.
the old grudges are too smudged to read into,
and the new memories are founded on moments of monumentalgratitude and generosity.
this is the way we live now,
and i am grateful for the time i've been given to span with these women.
that's it;
never quiet, never soft.....

Tuesday, October 21

berfdays.

fourteen.
mmhmm.
my daughter, harvest, is fourteen today.
yeah.
years, neighbors.
fourteen years.
in a row.
teenaged for a minute now,
and turning taller and older and everything.
today, tho-
today is the day.
the berfday.
and that means connecticut is where i'm headed.
ugh.
family togetherness and paternal activation and cake.
yep.
there will be cake, too.
obvi.
it isn't a berfday without berfday cake.
that's a thing.
and of course,
i'll be bringing it with me.
otherwise, i wouldn't get a slice.
vegan baked greats aren't invited to the party, usually,
unless accompanied by an expert.
lucky for me, i don't just know one, i flippin' am one!
i mean, sure, i have to bake it in new hampshire and bring it with me,
but active participation is kind of my thing anyway
(damn. b.y.o.c.      because box mix is for jerks,
and applesauce eludes the egg-dependent instructions-followers)
anyway,
i'm on that vanilla x14-type sh!t.
check the happy-berfday-harvest-type teleport:
yum.
what?
you think i went a little overdramatic with the photo?
oh.
well, how about you maybe shuuut up a little bit?
word.
it's dark out and it's raining, and it's an all-white cake,
and that calls for a double light source, and an eagle's-eye view. .
i used a LOT of frosting.
i mean, a LOT.
the cake math on this science treat?
okay-
i used 1.5x the frosting for a cake .75 the height of a regular one!
that's double, duders.
why?
because too much is the right amount.
you know that already.
so, there's goobieblops on top of swirls, and blarps on the sides and everything.
if there's still frosting in the pastry bag, you gotta keep squeezing.
rules is rules, after all.
and another 'nother rule for berfday cake?
sprankles.
seriously.
and since i'm reppin' a double circle of spirit and memory for the crumb,
with a wholeheartedly unholy helping of vanilla in myriad incarnations,
and even a little bit of top secret vegan white chocolate tapioca.....
(the kid likes plain cake, but i don't know if i can ever all-the-way hang out with that.)
anyway,
i've got my ring of cakey hottness,
and i've got so much frosting in so many bloppy drops,
which means all that was missing to take it to eleven, for fourteen's sake,
was to get the sugarglitter all up on it.
so,
i figured we could all do well with a punch or three of seasonal color-coordinated
site-specific harvest-hued sprankles!
yuuuuuuuuuup.
i made it work, neighbors.
***********
my kids are busy.
really.
like, they're so busy.
like, they're SO busy i'm on a lightning-striking viking voyage to connecticut
for a blitzkrieg of berfday family magic fun times,
because they've also got other other stuff to do.
hmm?
yes.
it's berfday cake, after berfday dinner, after berfday shoppin',
and all before seven p.m.,
so homework and studying can get done.
i will most likely see 'em for less time than i'll be carbound on the trip to get there.
and that's just in one direction.
however,
the alternative is to see the for NO hours, and that's no kind of option.
it's cars and crap and traffic and congestion,
a little tiny bit of overlap with the rest of my blood relatives,
and cake,
thank the heavens for cake.
*
harvest skye ruth.
a little wet pink squawking raisiny naked mole rat.
babies are just such waterlogged little grossies-
but that was the most beautiful thing to me at the time.
that's what i remember about this day, fourteen years ago.
and crying like a F*ing giant diaperbaby my own self.
my firstborn child, my little daughter...
now,
she's practically a person.
it's too soon, but it's also just right.
i mean,
events unfolds the way they're going to,
and time travel only goes in one direction,
and i sure am grateful for the time and direction that i've been given.
it's all really happening all the time,
but that's especially true today.
a big ol' sentimental heartful.
that's it;
never quiet, never soft..... 

Sunday, October 19

pie or cake?

BOTH.
obviously.
sometimes, a pie just hasn't got the girth, guys.
i mean,
they're generally not the stout bombers i'm craving, anyway.
but,
they've got all the flavors i want.
what do we do when faced with a choice?
we choose the wrench.
c'mon.
and we choose both options if they both have positives to enjoy.
hybridization is nature's way of making things more successful at existing.
therefore,
knowing that nature wins in the end,
it has to be mad-scientist bakery time in the woodlsy goodness.
doesn't it?
yes. of course it does.
apple pie cake.
that's a thing.
i know it is,
because i made it happen.
check the crumbly-cakey-type-teleport:
knobbly, bumpy, baked blocks of burly self-contained apple magic.
that's what's up.
graham crackers pulverized into flour,
and rolled oats ground up into the same,
apples, peeled and minced, and cooked with maple and cinnamon
and mixed into an extra buttery (creamchee' accented),
soy yogurt smootherized floury nutmeg-infused vanilla-bean activated
batter, and beaten into shape so all the best parts touched each other?
yep.
so expert.
and then that cinna-maple creamchee' frosting for your face, too??
in the middle, gluing it all together, because that's what pie is missing.
and on the top, dollop after dollop-
goobiebloppin' a little pretty princess swirl for that extra sweet treat happiness.
all the fall flavors are there,
and all of it is really happening.
where you been?
i mean,
you might wanna pop on by and scoople one up...
because otherwise you're missing out real hard,
and that's no joke.
*
the Folk Life & Liberty Fortress is all about apples and/or pumpkins,
why?
are you serious?
what do you mean, why?
what are you?
an A*-hole?
.....um, maybe because it's october,
and those are the rules.
neighbors,
the seasonal creations are in full swing.
whenever i'm not working or crafting,
i'm baking.
i haven't cooked anything fancy in a minute,
but i've been dominating that oven on the regular.
the thin gs i'm not doing are the things that don't need doing.
that's the way i'm looking at this month.
events unfold along the grid of squares on the calendar,
and this line of blocks is filled with cake and connecticut.
my time is accounted for,
and there will be presents to account for soon enough.
all of this, all the time,
that's what it's all about;
never quiet, never soft.....

too many hats.

so,
i've got an expert leatherette aviator cap,
with scrappy straps and flippy-flaps and crap all over the place;
i've got a daring derby of barbaric burly brown bowler dome dopeness;
i've got that whiz-bang word-up wide-top topper hat, too....
that's real, neighbors.
i got a lot of hats for hallowe'en.
the thing of it is-
they didn't go super well with my sergeant steampepper custom coat.
nope
not even one little teeny tiny bit.....
y'know what that means, don'tcha, duders?
that's riiiiiiight.
i had to have a whole other 'nother snazzy dazzler for my big bald pate.
mhmm.
because too much is always the right amount.
that's for real.
but, with that in mind,
i'm just sayin'-
i figure that if i'm gonna dress like a baron of baller-A* doodietwankles;
or an earl of expertism to eleven;
or even an archduke of activational loud, fresh, hardness,
i can't show up wearing some headgear that doesn't denote
the level of elite rank and pomp and substantial circumstantial site-specific personal style
and all of that sort of selfish self-righteousness my new hottness is is all about.
i can't be all bringin' that weak-sauce to hallowe'en, now, can i?
no way.
so i made myself something a little more appropriate
for an imaginary admiral of my presumed rank and standing.
check the general-gendarme-type teleport:
yeah!!!
and that insignia?
yeah, the big gold earring, with stuff on it.
that's what i mean.
a shield(button) and rivets(brads) and crossed axes!?!
that's what's up.
the barbarian outer provinces, guys.
that's where i'm thinking i'm hangin' out.
whatever that means.
at any rate,
that's the skulltop skillset i'm reppin' now.
one side has a ch-ch-chain hangin' off of it:
because that's manly,
even if the four types of ribbons and trims aren't.
the other has a dingle-string tassel dangle:
because old-timey armies liked fancy dazzlers all over the place,
and didn't believe in camouflage.
(as a result, they mostly got shot a lot)
what?
oh, yeah, definitely.
i love putting that overkill to it.
that's my thing.
i don't just do it,
i over do it, and add the fire and explosions to it.
what can i say?
i don't just talk about it,
i be about it, too.
hmm?
well, originally,
it was a german alpine ski patrol cap from the army surplus shop.
the thing is,
the germans have nice gear,
but throughout history, they're sort of the baddies, y'know?
so lacy crinkles and ribbons are very necessary for goodguyification of the goods.
really.
*
all day tattblastin' today?
yup.
all night craft-attackin' later?
lunch and/or dinner in there somewhere?
maybe.
i'm super busy,
and i'm super tired,
and i'm super motivated to take as few breaks and pauses as possible.
can i do it all?
probably not.
will i collapse at the close of business on all-saints day?
undoubtedly.
will i stop with this Q&A conversation soon.
yes, i will, right now;
never quiet, never soft.....

army armor arm.

well,
the gloves i had were the wrong ones.
yep.
just wait a minute, and i'll explain-
my daughter isn't quite 13 yet,
and she has very tiny hands.
like, tinier than a size small glove, even.
that means that without her here to wear an example of her specific
appropriately-sized hand-clothes,
i had to improvise.
but, the small gloves were too big.
lame.
so how was i spanning my saturday night,
after a loooong day of tattblastin' girls en masse,
complete with entourages of encouragers, well-wishers, naysayers, and pouters?
well,
after enduring that for not nearly enough compensation-
i took my hard-earned gains, and went to the department store.
saturday night is the exact time when the beastliest creatures ooze out
of whatever bog or semi-rotten stump they've been sleeping under,
and talk overloud, in their stained sweatpants, down every aisle, at the slowest pace.
and also,
it's when i buy gloves there.
hmmm?
yes.
i had worst time,
and i may have used the guilty-by-associative-property of worth-assessment
to really do a number on my previously adequate self-esteem.
yuck.
but the good news is that i got the gloves.
yes i did.
and when i got home,
i made a little gauntlet activation for the tiny-handed kid.
check the teleport:
robobotronic magic?
maybe so.
a steampunkish auxiliary artillery arm?
for sure.
what's better than power armor?
nothin'.
c'mon.
get a look at the sides:
righty-tighy.
i think the rivets are the best part.
or maybe the thumb.
or maybe the pipes.
heck.
i'm just excited for her to get it, and get fresh for the best holiday.
oh, yeah,
and the other other side:
lefty-loosey.
so,
that's what i was doing last night.
my big burly barbarian business was with small hands and stretchy fabric.
i s'pose it could've been worse-
i could've had to do what everyone else was doing.
this was definitely better.
***********
neighbors,
it got cold again.
out of nowhere, or really, out of the northwest.
(that's where the winds blow in from 'round these parts).
that means autumny blankets and fleecy sleepy pants,
and an extra cover or two.
that's good for nighttime comfort,
and it's great for climbing into all those comfy-cozies
after all the hot glue has cooled.
mmhmmm.
i'm on a time constraint,
and i've got acres of activation to engage in before the final bells toll.
i guess sleep isn't invited, and i presume that the nights,
while getting darker, earlier,
and gonna get a whole lot harder and even longer before the deathly hallows
do what they do.
we've got moves to make, kids.
we've got a job to do-
and this is it;
never quiet, never soft.....